everything's different since the last time i wrote, over a year ago, but i think that's pretty expected.

josh is gone.

sha'lisa is gone.

no more piano. hah.

merry very belated christmas.

i have the flu.

it makes me feel like i'm dying.

i miss my friends. & josh.

i know they'd be babying me right now. & i hate not being babied when i'm sick.

dad's trying, but he's not super great at it.

i dono.

i feel so gross.

i've only been awake like 5 hours today & yesterday.

& sleeping the rest of the day away.

yeah. okay. going back to sleep.

i quit my elf job. i don't think my mom knows yet.

thanksgiving sucked.

papaw cried in his turkey. :[

i knew it would be rough, but whatever. i'm going to bed. i have to work in 6 hours. 

& it's black friday.

g'day.

[p.s. happy birthday hannah. & nathan i guess, since you're twins.]

another piano-night update. i really don't wanna go tonight, at all. i have so much shit to do. & it's my only day off . & i just wanna do my stuff. & then go play. : [ but i can't. ugggh. i need to plan shit out for going to my dad's. i really wanna go up there. & plus i haven't been up there in forever. two jobs is gonna make this difficult. if i have to, i'll just give up my elf job to go up there. that would be depressing. but i'll do it. because he's more important. & i wanna see brooke. & give her a place to run away to for a little while.

i really need to do 50 more notecards. ugh. i don't even know what else to talk about. the pro's of censorship. i think censorship is ridiculous. i mean, it's necessary to a point. but some of this stuff i'm reading is retarded. & it's so hard to do a research paper on something i don't believe in.

jared's coming to get me before he goes to work. that gives me a couple minutes to go play up at the mall. haha. it's like a drug. :\ & i don't think that's a good thing. anyways. i'm in love with my new cell phone. he's a black gay..man? his name is montel. i think it's appropriate. he has to be a black gay man because he's black..with..SPARKLES! wooh. yeah. that just gives the gay away. now i'm just rambling. & procrastinating. i need to do my notecards.

EDIT: the ups man just brought my senior stuff! including my senior key. which is now around my neck & has my initials on the back. : ] & i just now started on my notecards.. 2 hours after i posted this. so i should probably get to work.

i had absolutely no idea how busy i was until i actually took a second to think about everything.

i worked friday. had saturday off. worked sunday. both of those were at the coffee shop.worked yesterday at the toy store. work today at the toy store. work wednesday at the coffee shop. have thursday off. but i have piano lessons. work friday at the coffee shop. saturday santa comes to the mall, so i start being an elf. sunday, elf. then on top of all that, school. 50 notecards due each class period is getting to be a hassle. & since that's for english 12, i've gotta do it. or else i won't graduate. wow. i just need to sit down & take a deep breath. i really had no idea that i was this busy. & i thought i was lazy for not registering for ACTs & whatnot. but man, i haven't had time. phew. i want a nap. but i've gotta go to work in like an hour. but i get my new cell phone today. i need to start saving money for christmas presents. & i owe my dad fifty bucks. blah. i dono. i'm taking a nap.